More Being, Less Doing
One of the biggest jolts for me in early stages of the pandemic was the abrupt halt of social activity. As a person who typically had five of her seven weeknights and the majority of her weekends scheduled with extracurricular events, classes, rehearsals, volunteering, and social engagements months out it was a shock to downshift in lockdown. At first I missed all of the flurry, the visiting, the variety of activity, but eventually settled into the convenience of simply logging on a few minutes before I was scheduled to meet groups online, not having to prepare myself as much, travel as far, or even wear pants. I was forced to pare down my daily lineups, which allowed me to see what I really missed and what I’d been attending for reasons outside of my own joy or philanthropic desires. I began to really enjoy that feeling. I started to exhale deeply. I even added “More Being, Less Doing” to the themes for my 2021 Intentions. I made a point to celebrate JOMO (Joy of Missing Out) instead of creating anxiety with FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). Like any intention, one has to keep it at the forefront in order for it to stick. And that’s not been easy.
Many of us have gotten fully vaccinated, rules have loosened, and options have expanded re: group events. We’ve sunk into the idea of adding back the activities. We started with keeping it mostly outside and with just a few people, but reduced the distance and extended the time. Now we are finding summer gathering invites in our inboxes and concerts venues excitedly reopening at least to partial capacity. We’re tempted once again to do all the things.
A month ago we celebrated a birthday with dear friends and “family” and perhaps in the name of making up for what we couldn’t engage in last year, we stacked the weekend with activity. We didn’t want to miss a thing! We raced and paced to coordinate a 5-pack plus around the metro area and beyond. In the process, patience became short, kiddos became exhausted, adults cried mercy (and one actually cried.) And we wondered if all the chasing around allowed us to fully appreciate any one of the activities. It’d been too much.
As an optimist I always find a lesson, so the morals here were “when in doubt, leave it out,” “less is more,” and “keep it simple.” They sound like a basic requests, but are much easier said than done. I continue to find challenge in balancing everything I want to see and do, but I’m finding that when I feel overstimulated or my thoughts are cluttered even in the planning process then it’s probably more than I show undertake. My partner calls me “Y-Dubs” for “Yes Woman” because I’m always up for adventure, but I’ve had to re-evaluate how I wish to enjoy the adventures, how I can bring myself more fully into the spaces I wish to explore.
I’m reminded of a favorite metaphor about the sculptor and their block of marble. To find the masterpiece within, nothing is added, only taken away. In paring down our lives, could we find our inner masterpieces in the stillness and silence? Can we actually thrive with less on our plates? Can we appreciate quality over quantity when it comes to things, people, and activities in our lives? I try to return to the peaceful state I experienced during the strictest part of the pandemic and say “yes!”
We can try. I will wake tomorrow and begin again to simplify. I will try to speak my truth to my loved ones when it feels like too much. I will strive to be a full yes for one thing instead of a half yes to multiple things. I will try to keep “more being, less doing” at the forefront. I will start somewhere—maybe still with a little too much—but I will start. Peace and Balance to you, my friends. Namaste.
More Being, Less Doing.